GIVING STRETCHING ADVICES...

[magalo le matelot]

This is a message for people that are giving a lot of advices on this forum. ''If you do that, THIS HORRIBLE THING will happen to your ears'' !

Did you ever skipped size? Did you ever stretched too soon? I assume you never did. So how can you talk about this and be SO SURE that this is true ?

If you had never experimented something by yourself, I think you shouln't talk about this like if you are the Ear Stretching God. Seriously.

I always laugh when I see those 0-gauges-person who give extreme advice on stretching. ''You can have tears, blowout etc !'' If you did it and wait 2 months between each stretch, how can you know if stretching with 1-2 weeks between sizes will cause you tears and blowouts ? And seriously, at those sizes, you ears are not even deformed. You don't know what is the clue with bigger stretchs. If you have personnal experience about something, THEN you can talk about it. If not, keep your advices to yourself.

You can say ''Piercers recommand 4 weeks between sizes''. But seriously I don't want to see anymore advices like ''WAIT A LEAST 3 MONTHS OR YOU WILL HAVE BLOWOUTS!''

That's all I had to say.

(sorry for my english that's not my native language)

[corazon_de_oro]

Okay, I'm pretty sure this is directed toward me, so here's what I have to say...
No, I never stretched too fast and I've never had a blowout or tear. I followed the advice of some people on a couple different forums that have unbelievably healthy lobes (some large, some small, IMO it doesn't make too much of a difference). I've also read and heard from friends and people online about bad stretching experiences. So far my stretching journey has gone smoothly and without problems, and I think that's how it should be. The advice I took is what's given me the results I wanted, so that's what I tell other people.

You really seem to look down on people with small stretches. I've been stretching my ears for a long time even though I'm only at 2G. I've also been researching it, reading experiences of people who stretched at different paces, comparing the lobes of people who stretched too fast to those who took their time, etc. I'm not saying I'm the god of stretching... it's just something I've learned a lot about and that I'm interested in. I'm stopping at 0G for now because I'm going to be a Spanish teacher and big lobes just aren't in the cards for me career-wise. I'm sorry you can't understand that someone with smaller lobes CAN know a lot about stretching. I would love 1/2" lobes but I just don't feel like it would be a good decision for me. I'm only 19 years old and while I know I'd be comfortable having 0G holes forever, I'm not sure about bigger ones. Body modification is not about having the biggest and most flashy tattoos and piercings, it's about altering your body in ways that make YOU happy.

I could say the same thing about you... just because you have bigger lobes (I guess you'd call them small but whatever) doesn't mean you know more about stretching than someone with smaller ones. And just because you stretched really fast without any major problems (although you said you've had blowouts... which is a pretty big problem if you ask me) doesn't mean that other people can.

When I stretch my ears, I pay attention to what my body is telling me. If I'm using a taper and at a certain point it starts to hurt or feels like I'd have to push really hard to get it through, I stop and wait longer. I think that's the best way to stretch, so that's what I tell other people they should do. And look at the thread someone else posted with the pictures of people who stretched too fast; they didn't all get their ears pierced and go up 20 sizes in one day. Some of them may have stretched every couple weeks or just skipped one size. Everybody's lobes are different, but with stretching patience is the best thing you can possibly have. In fact, in a lot of African tribes stretching symbolizes patience.

I'm going to continue giving people the advice that I feel is best. Having healthy lobes is important to me and I want everyone else to get the best results from stretching that they can. It's a permanant modification so it should look as nice as possible!

[corazon_de_oro]

I also encourage you to check out this site: bodyjewelleryshop.com/forum/
And more specifically, this thread:
bodyjewelleryshop.com/forum/showthread.php/8332-Stretching-Guide-and-All-Questions-Regarding-It

[magalo le matelot]

I just hate the way you make these equations:
Fast = Unhealthy and disgusting
Super slow = THE way

Since a lot of people want big stretchs RIGHT NOW (and not in 3 years), I think it's a must to make people know how to do it quickly but safely. Because of course you can do it. Just this weekend I saw 2 of my friends that have both 1 inch and a half (38 mm), and they're both super healthy and thick, and trust me they didn't take 10 years to stretch them.

And sure you can find a lot of pictures of disgusting lobes after skipping one size, but for each one you can probably find at least 100 pictures of healthy lobes that are done fast.

And knowing things by reading and researchings is never as accurate as personnal experience.

[corazon_de_oro]

But why risk it if you don't have to?
I may not have big stretches but I have had a lot of piercings and I know how they heal, when they're strong enough to be stretched, etc. Stretching weakens the fistula and it needs time before it can safely be stretched again.
Yes, you CAN stretch fast and have healthy lobes, but slower is always better; if you're not willing to be patient with your stretches maybe it isn't something you should be doing.
And I never say "OMG you will die if you do that!" I just tell people when I think they're putting themselves at risk for blowouts, tears, etc. Obviously someone who stretches one size every week is more likely to get a blowout than someone who stretches every six weeks. And honestly, I don't think six weeks is that long to wait at all.

Edit: Since you seem to trust advice more if it's given by piercers... a lot of piercers give HORRIBLE advice about stretching. I always see people saying "well at the piercing shop they told me I could go straight to an 8G and go up one size every three weeks after that" or something. But I go to the only piercer in my state who's a member of the APP and she gives the same advice I do. She's taken courses on the anatomy of wounds and has about 15 years of experience.

[leighmarie]

So far my stretching journey has gone smoothly and without problems, and I think that's how it should be. The advice I took is what's given me the results I wanted, so that's what I tell other people.

+1

You really seem to look down on people with small stretches.

+1

I'm sorry you can't understand that someone with smaller lobes CAN know a lot about stretching.

+1

Body modification is not about having the biggest and most flashy tattoos and piercings, it's about altering your body in ways that make YOU happy.

+1

I could say the same thing about you... just because you have bigger lobes (I guess you'd call them small but whatever) doesn't mean you know more about stretching than someone with smaller ones.

+1

(although you said you've had blowouts... which is a pretty big problem if you ask me)

+1

[Nic]

First thing i would like to say is.... LMAO. U guys are funny cuz ur both opposite opinions and opposites on the spectrum. I think that corazon de oro does give gud advice to an extent, cuz sum people are retarded an need someone to telll them that if it hurts its not right. I personally agree Megalo simply cuz i stretched up a size every week and i never had any problems till i ripped at half inch, lesson learned i never used tapers again. I now tape up my sizes. I to grow tired of the advice where u give an unrealistic waiting time, people are addicted an need to stretch up when they feel they want to. It shouldnt take years and years to stretch to small sizes. Idk if this is guna sound offense to any of you but i think that when people stretch to tiny sizes and take forever its kind of a waste, because it just looks like an earing. Its not about whos are the biggest, it never should be becuz everyone looks gud at different sizes. I cant speak for people with big ears cuz im just at 3/4ths but i figured id give my 2cents on this post. Was a gud read i have to say. thanks an happy stretching.

[corazon_de_oro]

You didn't get a tear because you used tapers, you got one because you went up one size every week.
And I absolutely cannot STAND the "why would you put effort into going to a small size" attituide. That is infuriating. First of all, if you're stretching larger, how you stretch at small sizes affects all your stretches for the future. You can build up scar tissue and make blowouts and tears so much more likely. I have scar tissue in my ears from past piercings and that's caused me to have to wait longer than the normal 6 weeks (which I don't think is that long at all... skin DOES need time to repair itself whether anyone likes it or not). Every time you stretch, you're weakening the fistula and while it shouldn't create any wounds when done properly, it just won't be strong enough to be stretched again for at least another six weeks. Argue with me all you want, but that's just how our bodies work.
I don't think my stretches look like an "earring," but even if I they do I couldn't care less. I don't stretch so people will go "OMG look at her lobes!" Even if I was at a big size my hair's long, thick, and always down so no one really sees them anyway. And even at 2G when I wear tunnels and earskins you can definitely tell they're stretched. I also like nice, hanging designs; some of them are truly beautiful even at tiny sizes like 10G. Small sizes are not a waste of time; the reason people get so many problems when stretching is because they're in such a damn hurry to get huge lobes and they don't even think about the damage they're doing to themselves. I don't care if you think you're "addicted" to stretching, you don't NEED to stretch up every week or skip sizes. Stretching is all about patience, listening to your body, and going to the size that YOU like. Everyone's giving me hell for giving advice at 2G but I've been stretching for longer than most of you!

[leighmarie]

I agree, I've always used tapers and never had any tears. :/

If it's taking into consideration the fact it's a PERMANENT body mod that will probably will be with you the rest of your life, then 6 weeks/2 months or whatever is absolutely no time at all in the grand scheme of things.

I'm at 8mm, and although it's definitely too small for me and I'll be going bigger, it looks nothing at all like an earring.
Like you said, everyone looks good at different sizes and it's not fair to make comments about the size of someone's stretch just because it's not a size you'd have.

And tbf, corazon gives the best advice on this whole forum. And like she said, she's been stretching a lot longer and has a lot more experience than a lot of people at bigger gauges!

[corazon_de_oro]

Thanks! :]
And I definitely agree that 6-8 weeks is not long to wait at all considering you're going to have your stretches (and the same pair of lobes) forever. My tattoo artist has lobes that are about an inch and a half or so and he took five years to stretch them. But last time I saw them he didn't have plugs in and they looked soooo healthy. I think patience always pays off; not just with stretching but with everything else.